THERE ARE VERSIONS OF YOU LIVING IN EVERYONE’S HEAD

To the version of me that you have sitting in your head.

Perception and persona are funny things.

I walk around with a pretty clear view of who I am, what I care about, my morals, and my why.

But to you, it may look completely different.

I’m here to tell you… that is okay.

You might see me as someone who is great, energetic, and totally on the ball (thanks for the compliments!), and I am… some of the time. Which makes me feel amazing, loved, and excited by life.

You might also see me as arrogant, overconfident, fake, and just “really good at PR” (oh yessssss, I have heard them all, and a few more I could list too). P.S. I am good at PR, but that’s not what gets the sculptures made.

This isn’t a note about which one of these versions of me is true or false. It’s a note to say that they exist at the same time.

Because I know these versions of me live inside different people’s experiences of me, the stories they have been told, or the stories they tell themselves.

It is truly fascinating to know there are so many versions of me running around the world, living parallel lives. Because they exist outside of my reality, they exist within yours.

Can I hire the one who has bundles of energy for a bit? Because I’m flagging over here.

Oh, and the arrogant one too, please… She could be very useful when dealing with difficult situations.

I also have a bubbly, fun, engaging version of you inside my head… oh wait, I also have the bitchy, jealous, nasty version of you sitting in there as well.

These versions of other people, for good or bad, that we have in our brains are mostly made up of misinformation, from a glimpse of an interview, a bad day, or a few interactions.

We all have good and bad sides to us, so best believe that is the way the world will see us.

I think the trick is not to be too distracted by either view. As a recovering people pleaser, it used to be my worst nightmare to even imagine someone disliking me. I’m happy to say I’m now very confident in the knowledge that people dislike me because you can’t be everyone’s cup of tea.

However, I would much prefer if we could all just sit and drink the tea together instead of spilling it on one another (connection junkie over here).

I’m guilty of it as well, of course. I have a few names I can confidently list that I strongly dislike and would be happy to never bump into ever again. But I have also had positive experiences with these people. I choose to think about those positive experiences occasionally to remind myself that they’re not all bad. They’re just human and complicated.

Accepting these versions of others and yourself might be the answer. They have a whole community that loves and supports them, and rightly so, because they are amazing… sometimes, and to some people, like the rest of us.

We’re all just milling along with different perceptions and narratives, and these stories and experiences overlap occasionally, creating harmony or tension.

But every time I catch myself thinking negatively, feeling jealous, or being uncharitable, I stop myself and think of all the hard work, dedication, and loved ones that person has.

I put my blinkers back on, realise that the version of that person in my head is not real, and get back to focusing on my own path.

So when you catch me in real life (or in your head), know that I’m just the same as you, a little human running around trying to make all the puzzle pieces work even when they don’t always fit together.